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You can't say civilization don't advance... in every war they kill you in a new way.
Will Rogers
You've got to go out on a limb sometimes because that's where the fruit is.
Will Rogers
I have a scheme for stopping war. It's this - no nation is allowed to enter a war till they have paid for the last one.
Will Rogers
I never expected to see the day when girls would get sunburned in the places they now do.
Will Rogers
I read about eight newspapers in a day. When I'm in a town with only one newspaper, I read it eight times.
Will Rogers
I'm not a real movie star. I've still got the same wife I started out with twenty-eight years ago.
Will Rogers
If advertisers spent the same amount of money on improving their products as they do on advertising then they wouldn't have to advertise them.
Will Rogers
If I studied all my life, I couldn't think up half the number of funny things passed in one session of congress.
Will Rogers
If Stupidity got us into this mess, then why can't it get us out?
Will Rogers
If the other fellow sells cheaper than you, it is called dumping. 'Course, if you sell cheaper than him, that's mass production.
Will Rogers
If you can build a business up big enough, it's respectable.
Will Rogers
If you ever injected truth into politics you have no politics.
Will Rogers
If you make any money, the government shoves you in the creek once a year with it in your pockets, and all that don't get wet you can keep.
Will Rogers
If you want to be successful, it's just this simple. Know what you are doing. Love what you are doing. And believe in what you are doing.
Will Rogers
In Hollywood the woods are full of people that learned to write but evidently can't read. If they could read their stuff, they'd stop writing.
Will Rogers
In Hollywood you can see things at night that are fast enough to be in the Olympics in the day time.
Will Rogers
Instead of giving money to found colleges to promote learning, why don't they pass a constitutional amendment prohibiting anybody from learning anything? If it works as good as the Prohibition one did, why, in five years we would have the smartest race of people on earth.
Will Rogers
It isn't what we don't know that gives us trouble, it's what we know that ain't so.
Will Rogers
It's a good thing we don't get all the government we pay for.
Will Rogers
It's easy being a humorist when you've got the whole government working for you.
Will Rogers
It's not what you pay a man, but what he costs you that counts.
Will Rogers
Last year we said, 'Things can't go on like this', and they didn't, they got worse.
Will Rogers
Communism to me is one-third practice and two-thirds explanation.
Will Rogers
Democrats never agree on anything, that's why they're Democrats. If they agreed with each other, they would be Republicans.
Will Rogers
Diplomacy is the art of saying "Nice doggie" until you can find a rock.
Will Rogers
Diplomats are just as essential to starting a war as soldiers are for finishing it... You take diplomacy out of war, and the thing would fall flat in a week.
Will Rogers
Do the best you can, and don't take life too serious.
Will Rogers
Don't gamble; take all your savings and buy some good stock and hold it till it goes up, then sell it. If it don't go up, don't buy it.
Will Rogers
Don't let yesterday use up too much of today.
Will Rogers
Even if you're on the right track, you'll get run over if you just sit there.
Will Rogers
Even though you are on the right track - you will get run over if you just sit there.
Will Rogers
Everybody is ignorant, only on different subjects.
Will Rogers
Everything is changing. People are taking their comedians seriously and the politicians as a joke.
Will Rogers
Everything is funny, as long as it's happening to somebody else.
Will Rogers
Get someone else to blow your horn and the sound will carry twice as far.
Will Rogers
Good judgment comes from experience, and a lot of that comes from bad judgment.
Will Rogers
Half our life is spent trying to find something to do with the time we have rushed through life trying to save.
Will Rogers
I am not a member of any organized political party. I am a Democrat.
Will Rogers
I belong to no organized party. I am a Democrat.
Will Rogers
I bet after seeing us, George Washington would sue us for calling him "father."
Will Rogers
I don't make jokes. I just watch the government and report the facts.
Will Rogers
I guess there is nothing that will get your mind off everything like golf. I have never been depressed enough to take up the game, but they say you get so sore at yourself you forget to hate your enemies.
Will Rogers
A difference of opinion is what makes horse racing and missionaries.
Will Rogers
A fool and his money are soon elected.
Will Rogers
A holding company is a thing where you hand an accomplice the goods while the policeman searches you.
Will Rogers
A man only learns in two ways, one by reading, and the other by association with smarter people.
Will Rogers
A remark generally hurts in proportion to its truth.
Will Rogers
About all I can say for the United States Senate is that it opens with a prayer and closes with an investigation.
Will Rogers
Advertising is the art of convincing people to spend money they don't have for something they don't need.
Will Rogers
Alexander Hamilton started the U.S. Treasury with nothing, and that was the closest our country has ever been to being even.
Will Rogers
All I know is just what I read in the papers, and that's an alibi for my ignorance.
Will Rogers
America is a nation that conceives many odd inventions for getting somewhere but it can think of nothing to do once it gets there.
Will Rogers
America is becoming so educated that ignorance will be a novelty. I will belong to the select few.
Will Rogers
An economist's guess is liable to be as good as anybody else's.
Will Rogers
An ignorant person is one who doesn't know what you have just found out.
Will Rogers
An onion can make people cry but there's never been a vegetable that can make people laugh.
Will Rogers
Ancient Rome declined because it had a Senate, now what's going to happen to us with both a House and a Senate?
Will Rogers
Anything important is never left to the vote of the people. We only get to vote on some man; we never get to vote on what he is to do.
Will Rogers
Be thankful we're not getting all the government we're paying for.
Will Rogers
Being a hero is about the shortest-lived profession on earth.
Will Rogers
Buy land. They ain't making any more of the stuff.
Will Rogers
Chaotic action is preferable to orderly inaction.
Will Rogers
